"Bell asked her why she was asking him to do this and Syr told him bitterly, that it was because she couldn’t stand the thought of him doing it with Ryu or someone else, before telling him that he wouldn’t understand. Bell said after that he doesn’t understand himself. Syr got confused and ask him what he meant. He told her that he doesn’t know himself why he is so desperate and why he is always constantly trying so hard. Bell seemed as if he was thinking more, but he stopped talking and after some time passed he fell asleep."

Can someone tell what was that "Bell said after that he doesn’t understand himself. Syr got confused and ask him what he meant. He told her that he doesn’t know himself why he is so desperate and why he is always constantly trying so hard. Bell seemed as if he was thinking more, but he stopped talking and after some time passed he fell asleep." part mean? Didn't understand why Bell talked like this?